G-man is transferring to Osaka this week, so we spent a great part of this past 3 day weekend hanging out and contemplating our lives and times on this great island/origin of the Japanese archipelago (according to the Kojiki).
One of the places we decided to visit for the last time was the Gandalf Bridge. Even though I am not leaving for another four months or so, I doubt I will visit it alone because it is right near G-man’s house, which is up on a mountain in the middle of nowhere. Gandalf Bridge got its name from the hordes of Shelob-sized arachnids that spin webs across its railings, necessitating a stick, aka magic wand, with which to clear a path. The Gandalf Bridge is one of the narrow, steel platform bridges you see spanning over the Awaji-Naruto Highway every ten miles or so. I have never seen anyone besides me and G-man using these bridges during my entire stay on the island.
I think they exist to allow road maintenance crews pass over, but not the crews for the highway itself – the crews that service the roads on either side of the highway. However, the roads on either side of the highway, for the most part, are totally overgrown with vines and seem unmaintained, so maybe my theory is just shit. Either way, Gandalf Bridge is a fucking cool spot to chill and drink beers. It beats the hell out of getting into fights with Japanese rednecks in the Lawson’s parking lot or slowly rotting to death in front of the TV, which seem to be the primary pastimes around here.
You can sit on the bridge for hours, watching cars pass both ways underneath you. If you are an asshole, or maybe in junior high, you can pee on the cars both ways, too. I suppose if you were a sicko, you could crap on them, too. We just chill, tho.
It was sad. The end of an era for G-man. No more Island of Salary for him. For me, I got a few more months. I guess it won’t be all that bad. Hey, I started out doing my time here alone – I can finish it that way, too. Good luck in Osaka, G-man. Good luck, G-man’s fam.
– This article was brought to you by the Association of Fam = Family for President.