I offered the ox a taste of beef, but he refused, saying that he was Hindu, and although this could be viewed as narcissistic, it hardly hinted at cannibalism. “Besides,” he said, “where I’m from, ‘corn fed’ isn’t a compliment.”
I guess you could call them yardlong beans, but most of the world switched to a better system long ago, and besides, where’s the fun in that?
It’s very rare to find someone who’s the master of so many things.
“Last Friday, Sony Music sent Gummy Soul a cease and desist order for Amerigo Gazaway’s “Bizarre Tribe: A Quest To The Pharcyde”.”
Sony just doesn’t get it:
They don’t know how to make good products anymore.
They don’t understand “fair use.”
They don’t know how to get back all the loyal customers they chased away over the years…
It seems they only want to make a last few bucks before Samsung and Apple and all the other companies who do get it (a little better, at least) collectively piss on their grave.
Die, Sony, die.
By the way, the album mentioned above is simply sublime.
JACK IS BACK! JACK IS BACK!!
But I dinna understand:
– NOTICE OF BAGGAGE INSPECTION –
To protect you and your fellow passengers, the XSA is required by law to
steal your wife’s panties and confiscate your house keys so you can’t get in when you arrive home from your 26 hour flight at midnight inspect all checked baggage. Your bag was among those selected for physical inspection (possibly because it contained used women’s undergarments).
During the inspection, your bag and its contents may have been searched for prohibited
or tantalizing items. At the completion of the inspection, many of the contents were returned to your bag (albeit not in the orderly or sensible fashion in which they were originally packed). Also, we forgot to completely zip up the outside pockets so that stuff was falling out of it when it reached the baggage carousel. In addition, we forgot to replace the suitcase straps… Our bad!
If the XSA officer was unable to open your bag for inspection because it was locked, the officer may have been forced to break the
crappy die-cast metal locks meant to keep out petty thieves and perverts on your bag. Our bad! We routinely invest in million dollar x-ray porn machines, but can’t afford a bent paper clip! XSA sincerely regrets having to do this, however, XSA is not liable for damage to your locks resulting from this necessary security precaution (because if we wanted to be accountable for our actions, we wouldn’t work for the government!).
We appreciate your understanding and cooperation.
WARNING: If you are vegan, watching these videos will melt your eyeballs.
There couldn’t possibly be a western equivalent to this horrifying act of culinary cruelty, right?
Attributing this reaction to ionic exchange somehow doesn’t make it less difficult to watch (again and again).
Offered mostly without comment because I’m still chewing on them:
The last Japanese man remaining in Kazakhstan
A Kafkian tale of the plight of a Japanese POW in the Soviet Union
An Evening with J. D. Salinger
Of course he’s crazy, that’s why his best works ring so true.
Educating B Students
My question is: Where have all the A students gone?
The New Atheists’ Narrow Worldview
If it weren’t for the crazy shit based in monkey-ass superstition, religion wouldn’t be half as entertaining… And in that regard, I think of animistic religions as more honest than others.
Alternate Universe Movie Posters
It was nice being able to sleep in a tent for a few nights this past year; I like camping and look forward to taking Max and Mina…
There are a couple of nice outdoors themed links I’ve been wanting to post, so:
Unforgettable Vacation In Karelia – Nice photo set from Finland or Russia, can’t tell which. (It’s hosted on English Russia, so watch for pop-ups.)
Then there’s this clip from a film called Alone in the Wilderness:
This kind of stuff just fascinates me – I often wonder if I’d be able to handle a month or two of solitude.
The guy’s homepage is here.
I’m acquiring the full video as I type this, so I may write about it again.
Never thought I’d willingly watch any part of that show.
Please stop making Facebook accounts for your babies and sending friend requests to all of your
friends “friends.” You are freaking me the fuck out with your poor judgment and obvious disconnect to the real world (you know, the one where any idiot can have a kid).
I dub thee famewhore mama / papa.
Turn up the sound, sit back (for 8 minutes), and watch this:
I hate listening to Royksopp, but I like it used in videos.
This brought back a flood of Japan memories. It’s funny how my memory has become compartmentalized by country. I have a set of memories that affects things I do every day. They pop up when I’m driving, cooking, or buying something at the store. I remember doing the same thing in different settings years ago. I can remember details like what it smelled like that day or the looks on people’s faces*. For the most part, these memories are very private and I feel like an island – but then I remember I can talk to Nam about most of it, and I don’t feel so alone.
What about the babies? They are going to grow up knowing at least two very different lands and languages. That is just their starting point – I can only dream of what the future holds for them.
* As I was writing this, I flashed back to driving in Bordeaux almost 15 years ago in a rented Opel Vectra (turbo gasoil) and almost t-boning a young guy in an VW Golf because I went on the wrong green light. It was such a bad mistake, the guy would have been totally justified in getting angry about it, but he saw I had realized my mistake and instead just nodded and gestured in acknowledgment.
Dictionaries have been removed from classrooms in southern California schools after a parent complained about a child reading the definition for “oral sex”.
These people are gonna die when they find out about that Internet thing.
Conan must emigrate to Comedy Central.
He has enough money already, now it’s all about the power.
That is all.