Jack Bauer vs. Sam Gamgee

Was I the only one to laugh out loud when a certain hobbit appeared on last week’s episode of 24 and proceeded to save Jack Bauer’s life by catching a detail that both Chloe and Buchanan missed?
Good ole Sam sure has some tricks up his sleeve. h0bb17 Pwnz!
Open a socket for me, Edgar!

We wants our beef bowls, Gollum

Last week we picked up some American beef at Jusco, complete with AMERICAN BEEF! FROM USA! stickers on the packs. “Awesome,” I thought. Beef bowl renewal at Yoshinoya must be imminent… Think again. And American companies wonder why they can’t compete in foreign markets… It’s called quality control, guys.
This is sad because, unfortunately, Aussie beef just doesn’t cut it for Japanese cooking – it’s too lean. I think Australian cows play hockey all day or something. New Zealand beef is much better from what I’ve seen – on par or better than American beef – but for some reason it’s a lot more expensive. Pretty much the same price as cheap Japanese beef though, so there’s no reason to buy it. Of course, NZ lamb is unparalleled in quality, so soft and tasty (I think it’s because they’re regularly injected with semen, but that’s a different story).
In other cringeworthy news, read yet another reason why you don’t want to be hospitalized in Japan, ever.

Role Reversal

I’ve been walking home from work again lately. I started this eco-transportation pattern last October where I’d ride the bus to work and walk home. My coworkers thought I was crazy because nobody really walks on this island (It’s the closest I’ve come in Japan to seeing as many people owning cars as back home in Cali – there’s no train and the buses suck, so you really need a car). It’s not that far, really, about 5 miles or so. But most people think I’m fucking nuts for walking that far after a full day of work.
It’s turned into kind of a habit because it really calms my nerves to be able to work off stress slowly, grindingly, every day. I can go home and take a shower and relax after that. Yesterday, though, it was really cold or something, cuz when I got back home, I sat down on the sofa anditwassowarmandfuzzy and – POW! – the next thing I know, it was time to go to work again. Didn’t even take a shower.
The funny thing is, Nam was working on school stuff and wedding stuff on the computer, and she kept asking me questions, which I barely registered in a state of half-awake paralysis. So she didn’t think I was really sleeping that long or something, because she ended up staying awake until 5AM doing her stuff. I woke up naturally an hour later, prepared for a presentation I had at 8AM, and came into work early all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I was one of the first to arrive, and greeted everyone with a loud ohayozaimasssu as they walked through the door. Pretty much down to the last man, they all gave me a mental Fuck Off w/red eye beam, and so I knew my transformation to Dedicated Salaryman with No Home Life was complete.

Hormonal Question

QUESTION: At a friendly get together, what is more annoying than having a guy who acts like he can kick everybody’s ass in the room, as well a girl acting like the head cheerleader at high school?
ANSWER: Having the same as above arrive as a couple and then getting sucked into their wine snob conversation.
SUPPLEMENT #1: And then finding out they get off on kissing in front of other people.
SUPPLEMENT #2: And wondering how they can act like this well into their fifties. Wrinkles and liver spots, baby.

Cell pro

T is Keitai Master. He can talk on the phone while skiing, driving, eating, playing the guitar, even while sleeping.