Typhoons # 18 and 19

The company is making us go home at an unprecedented 2:00 in the afternoon so you just know we are in for a real beating. I haven’t been this happy since the fifth grade… Just waiting for that bell to ring…
In other news, there was another magnitude 4 earthquake here this morning. It feels like the world is going to end, and all I can think about is the recess bell.

Sure Won’t Happen Here

Even more news from our future host country this week:
Follow the Leader: Israel and Thailand set an example by arming teachers.
Thailand has followed Israel’s lead by allowing school teachers in the troubled southern areas to pack guns at school. I think this is a great idea – who better to keep our children safe at school than their teachers? When I was young, my dad went to a lecture by Mel Tappan (he recorded it on cassette and I think it’s still in the garage somewhere), and brought back a paperback copy of Survival Guns. I believe that book addressed the issue of school shootings and teachers who packed firearms being the solution to “looney gunmen with AK-47” scenarios (but it might have been a different book; it was a long time ago). A lot of what I know about guns I learned from reading that book from end to end perhaps three or four times overall. My dad was obviously influenced a lot by him as well, as can be seen by the contents of our gun safe at home. I guess I speak of this fondly now mostly because here in Japan, guns are just a fading memory (except for airsoft of course). I now basically go shooting only during visits back home, or on trips to foreign countries.
I wasn’t aware that Thailand was so strict regarding firearms. I’ve been to gun ranges there (and admittedly got gouged with those heinous ammo prices – then again, for being able to try out an Anaconda, a SPAS-12, and an M-16A2, it was worth it), and my girlfriend’s dad apparently has several pieces in the bedroom for home defense. One time he apparently scared the shit out of a guy searching for lizards (to eat!) in the middle of the night. The guy was using a flashlight and when Nam’s dad saw the beam flash by his window, he opened it, pointed a gat at the guy and yelled “who the fuck are you!” The guy went home lizardless and perhaps in need of new shorts. (Now that’s my kind of father-in-law.)
Nam’s brother is going to some military academy in Bangkok as a continuation of his time spent in military training, so perhaps he can get me some range time once in a while. If worst comes to worst, I can get my cordite fix at a pay range somewhere in the vicinity. Whatever happens, I’ll have more of a chance then than I do now, that’s for sure. And that’s a good thing.
Since the last time I read Survival Guns, things sure have gotten fucked up for gun owners back home… I remember being shocked on a trip home a few years back because of the 10-round capacity limit for spare mags. That there’s some stupid shit. I heard that this eventually caused a shortage in supply for the hi-cap mags used for the US military’s M-9 Beretta – troops manually stretching out magazine springs or using ten-rounders because there were no good replacements available. That’s unforgivable in my mind.
How I ended up writing about all this gun shit, I have no idea. I think it must have been building up inside for the past ten years in kamikaze-turned-pacifist land. My term here is almost up, so I’m looking forward to being able to hold something more reassuring than my Spyderco when things go bump in the night (although edged weapons are perhaps more suitable in case of ninja attack).
//
This post was a product of my inner gun nut.
*Props to James Rummel for posting about the National review article.

Eating Fido

As a wannabe chef, I might have thought about making a submission to the Carnival of the Recipes #3, a showcase for recipes from all around the blogosphere, but got pretty miffed when I saw the introduction at the top of the page:

This week, we have a lot of great recipes to choose from. I am adding a rule, though – The Carnival of the Recipes will not link to any recipes involving household pets or horses, I don?t care if you live in France or Korea!

I really do not want to offend the author of the page or start any shit, but I’m sorry – that’s sounds racist as hell.
I can understand people being uncomfortable with what is eaten in other countries. Perhaps your tastes different from, say, the Marmot’s. But to specifically name countries (okay, specifically Korea – I don’t give a fuck what anyone says about France anymore and yes that’s my own prejudice speaking) kinda puts people off I think – well, then again the author says she “doesn’t care” so maybe I’m raising this issue for naught… I guess I care. It sounds too much like a dismissal of foreign food and culture. That’s kind of ironic since the author claims that she loves that they “are getting recipes from people all over the world.” So we can pretty much define “their” worldview as excluding cultures that eat horses or animals that Americans consider “pets” (a challenge in itself – I’ve had friends back in the states with pet cows, chickens, fish, sheep, and pigs, among other “acceptable edibles”). I find this a shame, because I really would have liked to share a recipe in the Carnival forum.
Note: If the author ever reads this post (and why should she; I’m a proud fucking nobody!), please do not construe this as a personal attack. I think I know what you were saying; it wasn’t a big “fuck you” to the rest of the world but rather a statement of what you are comfortable with, and I can accept that. I just needed to point out that it sounded kind of harsh from my current station overseas.
UPDATE: Check the comments. I feel really bad about writing this post now, but it would be wrong to take it down. I thought about this for a while, then I replied to Beth and John by e-mail and apologized. My recipe is for humble pie, but I’ll be damned if I can make it the same way twice… The only constant is swallowing your pride first.

Big Aftershocks

There was a magnitude 5 shaker in Wakayama earlier this evening when we were in a liquor store – all the stacks of bottles started moving back and forth, which was not the most reassuring of circumstances. A large aftershock came about five minutes ago… It was also a mag 5 but it felt a lot stronger here and they’re predicting tsunamis this time. There’s an emergency broadcast running in English and Japanese… Our little island should be okay. My place is half a mile from the coast so we should be cool. The shitty thing about living on an island is that it isn’t covered in the news… They predict tsunamis in Wakayama, Mie, and Kochi, and we live somewhere in between that plot. I guess that’s what air raid sirens are for (well, that and North Korean missile strikes). Cell phone lines are congested so I can’t get through to friends in Nara. Interestingly enough, land lines are working just fine – so to people who don’t use hard-line phones at home anymore, now’s a time to reconsider.
Shit, now they’re telling everyone living “near the coast” to evacuate. Is that very responsible for an island nation? Then again, we sat though The Endless Summer II yesterday and I have absolutely no interest in finding out what a 20 foot wave looks like coming down my street.

Lowriders of Thailand

These pics are from last year. We pulled into a highway reststop in the Thai countryside and were delighted to find a young entrepeneur selling coconuts from the back of his slammed pickup:
cocolow1.jpg
When I say slammed, I mean, look at that hydraulic kit!
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Check out the custom paint job – glittery goodness! And the gold door handles are to die for!
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Matching gold grille job… This guy probably accessorizes better than his girlfriend!

The Missing Kitten Epilogue, or, How a Ferret Stole My Thunder

So I suddenly got to thinking about the little black kitty I rescued a few months back, because, well, I miss him (BTW, the name Yoda stuck). I realize that I perhaps never related his ultimate fate here (a true catblogger I shall never be – hurray!). He was accepted as carry-on luggage when my sister went back home, and he now lives with Adam’s cat, Boo, and my dad’s little anklebiter dog, Jak, at our home in Fountain Valley, CA (AKA Pleasantville – a city so nondescript it’s often chosen as a relocation site for the FBI’S witness protection program).
I still haven’t posted my pics from my trip down to Kyushu (upon review I found them to be a bit -ahem! – disappointing) in July, but the trip was memorable as I went for the sole purpose of passing Yoda off to my little sis, and basically carried him in my arms everywhere I went. Girlfriend did not accompany me on this trip, so it was kind of nice basking in the glory of cute cuddly one-eyed glory afforded by the little rascal (A message from Justin’s auto-disclaimer circuit: It was nice in the sense that I could appreciate how a single, unattached man would have enjoyed such attention), especially since I discovered there’s not a whole lot of places that will kick you out for holding a cute ball of fuzz to your chest, even if they have “No Pet” signs. It’s kind of embarassing, but at the Japanese pseudo-mall, I would walk into a store and feel like a cool guy for Having the Coolest Toy, the kind Not for Sale in most stores.
Anyway, cut to the Kikuchi gorge, which is a beautiful, well, gorge – with a river running through it where people go to hike and take in nature in its purest (in Japan, anyway) form. The majority of people who visit this place – at most – take a daypack with drinks and snacks, except for the occasional nerd photographer that takes a huge camera bag, tripod, and other geekcessories w/obligatory yellow NIKON tags on everything (don’t even say it – I only took my consumer-grade Coolpix and a lens cloth). I took great pride in only packing in a kitten (had my little bro carry the backpack). So I’m in “Got a Kitten for the World to See” mode, hiking the trails and making people happy when they see me, when I come to a narrow part of the trail and stop to let people coming down pass. The last person in the gaggle is a withered old lady in a sunhat and Chanel shades, holding a ferret in her arms.
Suddenly aware that the cool factor of my kitten has dropped several degrees, I awkwardly try to start up a conversation with the stupidest opening line I can think of: “Is that a ferret?”
She answers, “yes.” (I can just picture those ancient eyes rolling up behind those Chanels.)
I try another angle; for some unconscious reason I need somehow to steal this venerable pair’s thunder, but am apparently ill-equipped in the wit department on this particular day: “Nice weather today, isn’t it?”
This does not even elicit a response and I can picture the words “jesus hurryupandgetthe FUCK OUTTA MY WAY!” written all over her face.
Yoda, who had been asleep during the hike, wakes up and starts wriggling around in my arms. He wakes to find an extremely interested predator staring straight at him from two feet away. There is a moment frozen in eternity when I can see the ferret is about to pounce – which I use as a chance to escape up the trail, away from the demonic obachan and her pet hellhound. To be quite honest, I don’t know who was more upset, me or the cat, but I pet his head as we retreat, mumbling “must stay away from eeevil ferretses, gollum – they only wants tasty kitten gutses!”
In retrospect, that kitten was a blast to carry around. I have a feeling I could stop using underarm deodorant, if I only had a puppy. Hell, with a baby I could stop wearing socks…
Hmm…