Musical Observations in Thailand

1. The most popular western band in Thailand is the Eagles
a. I have heard Hotel California more times in one week in Thailand than I did growing up in Southern California in the late 70s/80s
b. Thais singing Life in the Fast Lane at karaoke are no better at it than Japanese singing Country Road
c. Or, for that matter, Americans singing karaoke at all
2. The most popular band among Thai taxi drivers is Carabao
a. There is also an energy drink of the same name sold everywhere, one with a green label and a brown one marked XO
b. The one marked XO tastes like frog penis
c. Or at least what I imagine frog penis tastes like, you fags
3. Currently, the most overplayed music in the Chattuchak market stalls is Punjabi MC
a. Second is Linkin Park/Jay Z (Collision Course)
b. The only thing more annoying than overplayed Punjabi MC is the unmistakeable stench of shit that permeates certain areas of the market
c. Luckily, those areas do not include the deep fried pig stalls, which make the best deep fried pig in all of Thailand in my humble opinion
4. The violinist in the lounge of the the Fortune Hotel in Ratchada is tone deaf
a. Or maybe just never learned how to tune his shit
b. Or maybe just avant garde
c. Or maybe just hates his job and is fucking with everyone
5. Thai rap is fucking awesome
a. Now all they need is a Thai Flava Flav
b. With his clock set to “Thai time” (15 to 45 minutes late, depending on mood)
c. I saw a hooker who looked just like Terminator X walking down the street in a dress and high heels

5 thoughts on “Musical Observations in Thailand

  1. The tone-deaf, bad violinist. I hated his off-tune, scratchy, half-hearted efforts at mangling even the simple tunes. I think I should have paid him to Please, Stop!

  2. The worst karaoke I have ever heard was a British guy trying to sing “The Gambler” by Kenny Rogers.
    He had never heard the song before, and the tempo and pacing of it completely baffled him.

  3. Ah, yes. The violinist… Took me back to the days of my elementary school orchestra when kids are expected to play like that. Maybe he WAS in elementary school, and jsut REALLY BIG for a Thai?!?!

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