Attention Star Wars Nerds, I am Naming the 4 Kittens with Jedi Flava

They definitely deserve Star Wars names, as pointed out by Tina in the FB comments. The thing is, I’m kind of a Star Wars purist — there were three movies, and that’s it. Fuck Ani. Fuck Qui-Gon Neeson. Fuck double-bladed lightsabers.

The Internet isn’t much help as far as names that people have already thought of – Darth Claw, Jabba the Cat, and the like. I’m not really a cat person, and I need to feel like I tried a little bit harder.

So here’s a list of what I have so far:

1. Lando Meowrissian (well, I did say a little bit, right?): Lando for short. What can I say? I’m a big believer in Billy Dee.


Note: As a group, I am tempted to go with Rogue Squadron or simply, the Rogues. They are little wild things, after all.

2. Commander Wedge Antilles: Because he was Rogue Leader and the only pilot to survive both Death Star runs. He was also a pilot on Hoth in The Empire Strikes Back, the best Star Wars movie ever made.


3. Admiral Hackbar: Because hairball.


4. Akira Kurosawa: With Star Wars, George Lucas basically made a Murican version of The Hidden Fortress, but don’t take my word for it (side-by-side YouTube comparison).


5. Wickat: yub yub


I just remembered that the last kitten I had, in Japan, was named Yoda. Yoda, the one-eyed kitten who my sister hand-carried to America and was possibly eaten by a coyote in his later years. In Yoda’s honor, I will put all of these new kitten posts in his category: Yoda the Kitten.

Any suggestions?

9 thoughts on “Attention Star Wars Nerds, I am Naming the 4 Kittens with Jedi Flava

  1. Awesome.

    I would have said that “Lando CATrissian” would have been closer in pronunciation to the original name, but “Lando Meowrissian” works fine.

    Boba Cat? (off by two phonemes)
    Princess Flea-ah? (off by one phoneme)
    Grand Moff Furkin? (one phoneme… but is that too close to “merkin”?)
    Grand Fluff Tarkin? (maybe better?)
    Jabba the Fluff?
    The Death Purr?
    General Purr-donna?
    Obi-wan Catnobi?
    Luke Furwalker?
    Admiral Pawzzel?
    Fluff Vader? (or is that too porny?)
    Leia Purrgana?

    Google Translate tells me that “cat” in Thai is “???,” which Google transliterates as “Maew,” so I guess it’s onomatopoeia. Can that be incorporated into a Star Wars name somehow?

    1. Wow, Kev! That’s like a homerun comment… I was going to name the mom Leia anyways (well, Leia or Aunt Beru), so Leia Purrgana it is.

      Yes, it is pronounced in Thai like “mao” with a short “a.” (Your spelling, “maew,” is more accurate, but most people are confused when they see it.) In fact, I was thinking about this when I named Lando – his name, in my mind, is pronounced “Lando Maorissian.” Unfortunately, I have never heard a mention of Star Wars in Thailand that I can remember, so the humor is a bit personal/lonely. I guess that’s the entire existence of a nerd summed up, though.

  2. I see the Thai script didn’t copy over. Either that, or my browser’s encoding isn’t allowing me to see it in the comment (even though it was visible over at Google Translate).

    1. WordPress has never been great at encoding. I can’t be bothered to hack it myself, because I assume it will be addressed officially at some later point in time… And I have a cat farm to watch over, man!

  3. How could you leave out Cindel? From one of the BEST Star Wars movies of our childhood, “Caravan of Courage: An Ewok Adventure.” We watched that a bajillion times, dude.

    Other approved Ewok names include: Chirpa, Logray, Teebo, Paploo, and Nicki. I have no idea how that last one snuck in there, but all six are listed in the official episode VI movie credits, so go figure.

    Young Ewoks are called woklings, by the way. I know you were wondering…

  4. Nice post, daddy-o! I won’t be surprised to find a lot of creative comments on possible names for those feral kittens but happy that they provide a nice distraction for you during your single-parenting, hard-working days and nights. Now, make sure the kids don’t get too close to them because feral momma cats can cause cat-scratch fever, toxoplasmosis and more!

      1. Yeah, having rescued and rehabilitated feral kittens before, once their eyes are open, it’s way late to try and handle them without their primitive protective response on full hissy-fit alert! And they will not only hiss, but also bite and claw because they’re scared of you.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.