More notes on emergence

Since quitting smoking is probably the most important decision I made this year, I might as well write about it some more.
Before I quit smoking, I was sure there were a few scenarios in which it would be near impossible to stand strong in the face of temptation after I quit. These situations included:

  1. A victory smoke while standing over the bloody corpses of my vanquished arch enemies
  2. Cognac in one hand, stogie in the other after a magnificent feast of roast swan and eel fingerlings
  3. During the time-honored tradition of smoking friends fucking with someone who’s trying to quit

Well, I haven’t vanquished anyone or eaten swan yet this year, but I did get fucked with pretty hard on Tuesday night. My pal Don called me out for a drink to a new bar about three minutes from the new house. The bartender had worked at the Sukhothai Hotel in Bangkok for 7 years and I went overboard playing cocktail trivia with her, ended up drinking nine drinks in 90 minutes. Went outside for some fresh air, forgetting that the front of non-smoking bars is strictly smoker territory. As mentioned above, I was fucked with.
“Here, just have one hit!”
“Just have one, you know you want it!”
“Here, can you hold this for me? I have to tie my shoe.”
Bastards. I deserved it, though, because I’ve done the exact same thing to friends trying to quit.
Funny thing is though, it wasn’t that hard. I had already stopped for about a week and I knew if I had one cigarette, it wouldn’t be just one, so… It wasn’t that hard.
What I am finding hard, though, is not smoking in my dreams. I try to resist the temptation in my dreams, but it’s just too hard. And it’s so realistic that I wake up feeling guilty and looking at my wife’s sleeping face to see if she noticed!
Maybe I should just enjoy it… Is smoking in the dream world bad for your health?

1 thought on “More notes on emergence

  1. Can you eat and enjoy the taste of the scrumptious food in your dreams?
    Or is it just the cigarette smoking?
    I think it’s great to smoke in your dreams as long as you don’t inhale!

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