More notes on emergence

Since quitting smoking is probably the most important decision I made this year, I might as well write about it some more.
Before I quit smoking, I was sure there were a few scenarios in which it would be near impossible to stand strong in the face of temptation after I quit. These situations included:

  1. A victory smoke while standing over the bloody corpses of my vanquished arch enemies
  2. Cognac in one hand, stogie in the other after a magnificent feast of roast swan and eel fingerlings
  3. During the time-honored tradition of smoking friends fucking with someone who’s trying to quit

Well, I haven’t vanquished anyone or eaten swan yet this year, but I did get fucked with pretty hard on Tuesday night. My pal Don called me out for a drink to a new bar about three minutes from the new house. The bartender had worked at the Sukhothai Hotel in Bangkok for 7 years and I went overboard playing cocktail trivia with her, ended up drinking nine drinks in 90 minutes. Went outside for some fresh air, forgetting that the front of non-smoking bars is strictly smoker territory. As mentioned above, I was fucked with.
“Here, just have one hit!”
“Just have one, you know you want it!”
“Here, can you hold this for me? I have to tie my shoe.”
Bastards. I deserved it, though, because I’ve done the exact same thing to friends trying to quit.
Funny thing is though, it wasn’t that hard. I had already stopped for about a week and I knew if I had one cigarette, it wouldn’t be just one, so… It wasn’t that hard.
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What I am finding hard, though, is not smoking in my dreams. I try to resist the temptation in my dreams, but it’s just too hard. And it’s so realistic that I wake up feeling guilty and looking at my wife’s sleeping face to see if she noticed!
Maybe I should just enjoy it… Is smoking in the dream world bad for your health?

One Reply to “More notes on emergence”

  1. Can you eat and enjoy the taste of the scrumptious food in your dreams?
    Or is it just the cigarette smoking?
    I think it’s great to smoke in your dreams as long as you don’t inhale!

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