Rot Canal

The worst thing about getting a root canal, so far, is the pungent stench of rot that permeates my mouth when the epoxy plug is pulled out of my tooth every week for cleaning, and then replaced again. My dentist’s insistence on holding conversations in pseudo-English while my mouth is filled with drills and shit comes a close second, but that momentary putridity is always a kick in the pants. It is disturbing on a basic level to be reminded that cells are constantly dying within one’s body…
Today was the last check and antisepsis before getting my crown – that’s in two days. I’m assuming it’s a painless procedure, so if any of you know differently, please shut the hell up until then.
Also, I just realized this is my first opportunity for bling: Although the crown is going on my rearmost molar, should I go for gold instead of the stainless look? How about a 1-carat diamond? Nothing says pimp like a 1-carat spinning stud on a gold crown, right? Hell, maybe I’ll ask my dentist to install some hydraulics and fuzzy dice to match.