…and the law got body-checked

So I got the call from the bank yesterday and they changed their minds about having me inside the bank, I guess. They offered to meet me on my lunch break in the union office next to our company cafeteria today. They told me to bring ID and my hanko (personal seal) to sign off on a receipt, to which I said, “no.” The guy replied I could sign my name instead of using a hanko (as if that was the problem), and I basically made up my mind to not sign a goddamn thing before going into the meeting today. I mean, I did nothing wrong, so why should I have to do anything to get back what is rightfully mine? I even mused over demanding they pay interest on the money they “borrowed” from me for 24 hours, but to be honest, I got tired of the whole damn thing and just wanted to end it quickly and painlessly.
But. The rep they sent today was a total fucking tool. First of all, he didn’t even apologize for the shit they put me through. Second, he sneered at me when he said my first name, as if it was a piece of foreign shit sullying the inside of his mouth. If you know me, you will be proud to hear that I didn’t strangle him on the spot. No, I was determined to get through this shit and forget about it as quickly as possible. However, bankboy slipped up – he didn’t check my ID and just asked me to sign a receipt. I took out a pen and pretended to read it over during which time he laid a cash envelope on the table. I counted the cash (all 25,000 was there), slipped it in my wallet, and stood up to leave.
As I exited the office, bankboy yells, “Yoshida – wait, you gotta sign this receipt!”
So now it’s Yoshida, eh? What happened to “Jasuchin,” you little bitch? I reply, “Is it gonna be a problem if I don’t? Will you be inconvenienced?”
“Yes, it will be an inconvenience!” he says.
“Good, now you’ll know how inconvenienced I felt yesterday” is the line I was waiting to drop all day, and now that I’ve used it to full effect, the girls eating lunch behind the counter are quietly cheering me on.
I walk out of the office and down the hall, and this is where the story takes a turn because – you guessed it – bankboy isn’t ready to let the matter drop. No, he decides it’s time for physical confrontation. He lets out a kiai, grabs my shoulder from behind, then gets in front of me, blocking my path with his body and grabbing the front of my work uniform. Then, he is grabbing for air and grabbing the wall, because somehow my body remembered how to be a defensive lineman after all these years and sent him flying without slowing down for even a second.
I did not look back.
It will be interesting to see if they come after me in some way – through my company or the union, or even the authorities (there’s my hard-wired paranoia circuit kicking in). But I won’t lose any sleep over it. Stupid fucks.
UPDATE: They DID come after me. Surprise, surprise. Luckily, my company LOVES me and stood behind me all the way. A couple of my supervisors came to see me and were as apologetic as the bank shoud have been. I explained the matter in detail and finally decided to sign the receipt (which the supervisors were passed from the bank) because it would have inconvenienced my company, who as far as I’m concerned is a completely innocent and unrelated party in this matter. However, I was adamant about having the bankboy reprimanded for being unapologetic and more importantly, physically assaulting me, and the supervisors promised to get on the bank’s ass about it for me. So… Closure. Sweet, sweet closure.
I FOUGHT THE LAW AND THE LAW GOT BODY-CHECKED.

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