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You are a sick teddy. You are a very sick teddy.
In fact you are such a sick sick teddy that I’m also becoming sick.
Oh lord, please turn me into a sick sick teddy…

I found this gem in my inbox today. It kind of made my day.
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This is my Hangame avatar. Hangame is the site where we play hanafuda
(Go Stop); I described it in this post a few weeks back. Basically, I picked the most insane combination of clothes, accessories, and facial features I could in order to distract opponents when my avatar appears on screen. Not surprisingly, most players I go up against leave the playing table fairly quickly. I used to have a machine gun slung from my avatar’s shoulders, but it was so otaku that nobody would play with me. I had to tone it down.

Googlus Interruptus

Props to the Big Ho. His evil plan has worked. I was two clicks away from climax before I found his turd in my cream pie.
In all fairness, I can’t really complain now that my own evil plan has achieved an admirable ranking of its own. Now everbody repeat after me:
Adam Yoshida is an English Teacher living in Japan.
Adam Yoshida is Canadian.
Adam Yoshida is a “pretty princess.”
Also:
Kevin Kim (aka Big Hominid) is the owner of the Anger Poultry House.
Kevin Kim is a slobbering australopithecus with mad drawing skills.
Most importantly, Kevin Kim loves Korean wrestling.

Traitorous

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Any person who can defend this despicable shit isn’t welcome here. There is a line that demarcates what is OK and what is not, and although its exact location can be perceived differently depending on who you are, it has clearly been crossed here. My love for my country is deeply ingrained, and I felt deeply insulted when I saw this photo of the war anniversary protests floating around the net.
Just because you have freedom of speech doesn’t mean we must forgive the shit flowing out of your mouth.

Condition Zero Review

In 3 words: Disappointing as hell.
Description: CS 1.6 with bots. There were a few new maps and minor tweaking of some old maps. Whoopee.
Worth 30 bones (at discount price)?
HELL NO! But if you are a CS junkie, you will buy it anyway (like I needed to tell you that)
Interesting note: If HL2 is this disappointing, I may smash my comp and only play sissy console games from now on.

Vampire Killer

It is just past ten o’ clock and I am stewing in my own fumes. I ate a plate of spicy Thai pork for breakfast and it is now overly apparent that the secret ingredient was garlic. Normally I would have no complaint as the breath of death keeps perky morning office assistants at arm’s length until well past lunch, but today I have a meeting. With bigwigs from overseas. Overseas as in, “garlic novice” overseas. Heh.
I have popped a lemon cough drop in my mouth and it now feels as if I could marinate a chicken in there to make some exotic chinese dish. Hooray for honey-lemon eucalyptus. This should do the trick as long as I keep a lozenge in my mouth at all times.
Except that now I’ve started burping under my breath. Garlicky richness erupts from the depths… Guess I’ll show up at that meeting with some stakes and holy water just to get into my role – wouldn’t that be a first! I’ll completely redefine my company’s approach to hostile negotiations…

1MB/second

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My Hikari rocks. This is the fastest browser download I have ever experienced.
Question: Why does IE express download speed in bytes/second? According to numion:

In data communications only the Metric definition of a kilobyte (1000 bytes per kilobyte) is correct. The binary definition of a kilobyte (1024 bytes per kilobyte) is used in areas such as data storage (harddisk, memory), but not for expressing bandwidth and throughput.

So is this usage in IE correct or not? Somehow, I think it is not. Anyhow, this speed of 1.00 MBps is also equivalent to:
8000000 bps (bits per second)
1000000 Bps (bytes per second)
8000 kbps (kilobits per second)
1000 KBps (kilobytes per second)
8 mbps (megabits per second)
It is near the maximum speed of a 10Base-T LAN (10 mbps). The speed tests that I sometimes use show that my max download (and upload) speed on an average day is actually more than three times this, but I have never connected to an HTTP server that could keep up with this during actual net use, even in Japan. It’s like buying a Ferrari – 99% unused potential, and you just know the girls be all over my ride (Can you take me for a ride on your fiber, baby?). Smokin!

Dead to Rights Game Review

Even though I haven’t posted forever, I feel the burning need to warn fellow FPS enthusiasts about the PC game, Dead to Rights. I am very glad I “test drove” the “free” version (thank you, BitTorrent!) of this dreck before buying it. This is an X-Box title ported to PC, and it apparent in its blockiness, difficulty of use, and bloated code. The cracked version is 4 CDs in size! (The fourth CD contains only the crack.) Dude!
Also, a general observation regarding this whole genre of games:
Mandatory “auto-aim” sucks! I understand it as an option for the console game crowd, but people who play FPS on the PC platform are more sophisticated than that (or at least most of us like to think so). I mean really, why the hell have a scoped rifle in the game if you can’t even use the scope and aim it by yourself?
/end nerdrant