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Think Global, Act Retarded
You would think that the Lipovitan crystals I smoked before yesterday’s rant would have worn off by now. You would be wrong. Today’s unwilling recipient of my hate is our company’s uniform. Specifically, the branding on it. I have actually grown quite fond of wearing a uniform to work, because it’s a hell of a lot easier than choosing barney-ass cubicle clothes every day (and hence cheaper as well, since I’m a gentle fucking giant in Japanese sizes and must import all my Dilbert-wear). However, a few years ago, my company changed vendors for our “Confederate Grays,” and said company named this line of poly-blend uniform, “EARTHINK.” Now, all of…
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Japanese Rantfest 2004
(Be warned, I just stubbed my toe REALLY HARD on an old printer someone left in the hallway for pickup tomorrow. The following passage was brought to you by the school of ?Ignore the Pain and It Will Go Away,? and the Foundation for People Who Woke Up on the Wrong Side of Humanity This Morning.) Note to self: Write future rant about the simplicity and nuance of the Japanese language being too often cloaked in stiff politeness. Wait. On second thought, I guess there?s not much to expand on there? Don?t think anyone would disagree with that. More precisely, anyone who would disagree probably has a pathetic social life,…
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Earthsea: “Not-so-uppity” version
From a young age, I always found solace in science fiction and fantasy writing. I read The Hobbit for the first time in 4th grade, and never looked back. So it’s very disappointing to hear the disappointment created when the Sci-Fi channel decided to do a TV adaptation of Ursula K. Le Guin’s Earthsea books: A Whitewashed Earthsea The punchline in that article, in my opinion, was their choice of Danny Glover. I guess it just as easily could have been Morgan Freeman or Denzel, but still… My fervent hope is that the Narnia movies, at least, treat the original books with a bit more respect. Ursula K. Le Guin.…
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Business E-mail Format in Japanese
I was just issued this “staff support book” which outlines employee duties, good work practices, and various other goodies which are causing me great joy, because they are the best example of Japanese corporate stupidity and herdthink. The page below is entitled, “E-mail Manners.” The previous page is “Fax Manners,” and the next page is “The Proper Way to Give and Receive Instructions.” Now, in all fairness, the tips on this particular page aren’t all bad but the sample e-mail they show is just the worst example I can possibly imagine. For instance, everything from the line of slashes on down is a signature. Also, I find the lack of…
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Should I stay or should I go?
Two words: WORK. BUSY. Oh, hell, one more can’t hurt: FUCK! But this is not a Work post. This is about whether I will be overhauling this site during winter vacation or not. You see, I’m thinking about ditching Movable Type for another blogging platform. It is a great shame that MT’s great success is quickly becoming its downfall due to comment spam, but it is a fact. Spammers target MT blogs in particular because of the broad user base – spamming is all about volume, I guess. Spam pisses me off, and I tend to take attacks on my weblog rather seriously. So. I have thought of upgrading to…
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LET’S ENGLISH !!!
Reading this article about a study that found early English education in Japan to be useless (link found on Nippon Goro Goro) reminded me of the story of a Japanese kid named Ringo. “Ringo” is Japanese for “apple,” so right away you know that A. this kid’s parents were some really sadistic fuckers (Ringo was his real given name, and in Japan there are no middle names to fall back on) and B. this kid’s probably gonna end up on the news someday for disembowling schoolyard bullies and scrawling “I’m a BAAAD APPLE” in blood on the walls. Anyhow, Ringo’s parents hired an English teaching acquaintance of mine to teach…
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Notice: My readers can kick your ass
Some of you who follow the comments closely here know that I’ve been subjected to various death threats, etc., over the past year, but I want you all to know it’s truly been a learning experience. I really love the commenters because they’re a true source of knowledge. This blog seems to draw readers from all walks of life. I find that extremely cool. For instance, what other blogger can claim to have readers that smoke crack? (Danielle, I’m not saying that in a bad way. Really. And maybe you just work in a clinic or something, which would be even cooler.) Can’t you all see? This is the true…
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The War Book
I found another great archive of posts from Iraq by one of our soldiers (now back home): Citizen Frank: The War Book
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Ben Gay, Astro-Glide, etc.
To the Big Ho: I agree that neither Ben Gay nor Tiger Balm is good for the “Nardic Sack” in winter, but there’s no need to have it sent from the states; they sell it in Namdaemun (see center area of pic). Update: Which is not to say it’s particularly good at other times of the year or anything.
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Infamy
Many Japanese remember Pearl Harbor differently: Pearl Harbor Part 1 Pearl Harbor Part 2 Then again, I remember a walk in the park back in high school. December 7th. Fountain Valley, CA. An old white guy approached me and said I should be “ashamed to walk outside today.” To be truthful, I had no idea what he was talking about until he started talking about “sneaky Japs,” and got in my face about “what my country did.” Then I remembered what day it was. I remember wanting to smack him down for a brief second, but turned away in disgust. That’s how December 7 got burned in my memory for…
