School of Rice

I proudly present to you the latest combined efforts of myself and my little bro:
School of Rice
The purpose of the blog is twofold; first to document rice in the sense of tacky car mods (such as bazooka-like exhaust pipes, homemade rear wings, and HKS stickers), and second, to document anything else we categorize as rice. In other words, I have not a clue, but am determined to make this new blog a success because I like the name so much. School of Rice. Maybe I’ll shelve some recipes there, too.
Be sure to check out the uber-rice shot Adam posted today… The recent BMW 7 series lineup is ugly enough as it is…

Earth to Politicians

Now we start with the real hurt; time to break out the industrial strength can of Smear. I predict a scandal with drugs, hookers, or some such felony will break soon. Some possible headlines:
Jenna and Barbara Sic Secret Service on Gay Rapper! As a Joke! While Stoned!
Teresa Heinz: Godmother of John Walker Lindh Urged Him to Fight
Curious George to Michael J: I’ll Watch Bubbles While You’re Gone, Baby
Kerry, “Just a Cool Guy,” Sucked Glass Dick with D12 Backstage, Says Eminem.
First Lady Owns Stock in Dutch Wife Co, Ltd.!
OK, this is obviously a work in progress, but you get what I mean. At some point, it stops being a choice between two candidates and becomes a shit-slinging contest… In the end, nobody emerges clean.

RE: cosmicbuddha.com

To all of you who can’t catch a hint (such as repeated refusals as well as a 9-year renewal via Network Solutions AKA Bloodsuckers Inc.):
cosmicbuddha.com is not for sale. I don’t give a fuck if you think it should belong to the Buddha’s Association of Templar Sanctorium, the Online Buddhist Trinket Vendor Compendium, or His Holiness the Dalai Lama, it is mineminemine and I can very fucking well use it for whatever the fuck I want and you get zero – I repeat ZERO – input in this respect. You want to me to “keep it real” and have some followers send me golden prayer beads by registered mail until I asquiesce? Fine. Send me the whole string so I can melt them down and make myself a proper sceptre with which to smite you irritating fuckers.
And no, you cannot advertise for free here. You can’t advertise here, period. Not on a banner ad, and not in the comments. I don’t have any ads at all, and for good reason: I’m “keeping it real,” a lot more real than you give me credit for… Let me ask you a question: Who do you think the Buddha would hate more, ME for having this domain name and “using swear words” on my own fucking site here, or YOU for pushing fake gold and jade Buddhist trinkets to people who are insecure in their own spiritualism?
Of course that’s a ridiculous question; just look to whom I ask it.
//
After much soul searching, this domain is now for sale. Asking price is 1,000,000 undead souls (preferably the old and weak) and a string of 24k gold anal prayer beads. Now suck that, bioooooooooooootches.

JDIC

It occurred to me today that I haven’t been to a public library (not counting my bathroom – don’t laugh, even in an extended disaster situation there will always be enough “paper” in there) for a pretty goddamn long time – ever since moving out to this island, so about five years. After university, there just wasn’t much reason to go, especially since I had my trusty old Powerbook 190 and an Asahi-net dial-up account. Oh, and also because I hate reading books in Japanese since I’m pretty good at it but not good enough to not want a dictionary beside me, and paper dictionaries are heavy.
I love public libraries, partly because I’ve always been a bookworm, but also because I love seeing what other people are reading. In Japan, just like anywhere else, you can tell an awful lot about people by the books they’re reading. For instance, people who come in just to read newspapers are cheapskates (or poor), and generally have too much fucking time on their hands. They often reek of cheap coffee and are comparing ticket stubs to sports results. People who read western fantasy in Japanese are generally to be avoided (not a problem because they are almost always socially inept). People reading novels by Ramo Nakajima (even before he got busted on possession charges) have either smoked weed at some point in their lives, or have grandparents who lived in Manchuria. And people reading Osamu Dazai may be more prone to suicide by drowning than others. Go figure.
I also love public libraries for the same reasons I love public file servers. All those permissions and protocols and hierarchies, I suppose. For such a slob, I sure do love a clean house sometimes.