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INDIAN GUIDES!
AHA! A possible explanation for my recent Indian chief dream (see my mom’s comment at the bottom). I completely forgot about that! Actually, catching that sheepshead won us the “fishing tournament.” I remember being extremely proud about the fact that we used small rock crabs that I smashed with my dad’s “abalone prybar” (a flat piece of iron with rubber grip I think may still be rusting in our garage or the backyard shed) to catch that fish. The funny thing is, before we landed that one, something big hit our bait and nearly jerked me off the rocks we were fishing from as I held onto the surfcasting rod…
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Itsy Bitsy
The first time I tried to catch him, he jumped out of the tupperware and onto my hand. Talk about goosebumps… I nearly shit my pants. Nam yelled at me not to kill it – kill it? HOW? Besides, woman, you’re standing on a chair after I flicked it on the floor! After I finally captured the Mighty Awaji Bird Eating Spider, we took a walk down the street and released him in the bushes next to Jusco. If you look closer (open a larger photo by clicking on it), you can see he’s missing a leg. He might be the same one Adam photographed on the front porch last…
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This Just In
Attention all Americans in Japan, whipped cream in cans is NOW AVAILABLE AT A JUSCO SHOPPING CENTER NEAR YOU!!! Fear not the Euro-sounding Chantibic brand name, this stuff looks, smells, and lubricates just like Redi Whip! (or so I’m told) Get your hands on a can NOW, while supplies last – I fear the Japanese palate will reject the simple flavor of pure canned whipped cream and the manufacturers will soon be forced to churn out localized blends: – Nama Ume flavor! (Great on hamo sushi!) – Wonderful Wasabi! (Perfect with chu-toro!) – Dashi (Just spray on a hot bowl of rice for an instant meal!) – and of course,…
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Yoshida Porter I am not
What the hell? (see comments at bottom of that page) May as well have some fun with it, I guess.
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Speech-to-text it is not
Speaking of cars, the new voice-controlled car navigation systems are a total fucking trip. A couple weeks ago, I caught a ride with a guy from work to an after-work enkai (drink up) in his new navi-equipped ride. I truly felt like a stranger, because he carried on a conversation with the in-dash navigation system, which he has dubbed Keiko, the whole way. DRIVER (using destination input command): Keiko! Destination, Taiho (restaurant name), Route 28. KEIKO (in sexy woman’s voice): Confirmed. Time to destination is approximately five minutes. DRIVER: Keiko! Thank you. KEIKO: You’re welcome. Now this was pretty fucking geeky and I teased the fuck out of my coworker,…
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Toyota Presents: Driving for Dummies
Annoying beeps and auto-braking are quite possibly the most unwanted features I can think of, for a car. And yet: Toyota Computer Makes You Watch the Road What we really, really need is a Remote Bitchslap Feature. That guy weaving across three lanes? RBF. The secretary type who can’t stop glancing at her PDF/keitai every two seconds? RBF. That ugly guy with index finger probing for salty green nostrilnuggets? RBmothafuckinF. Warning: I will most likely be automatically RBFing every white Toyota that passes, just on principle. (link via)
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The Pedantic Culinary
It’s not easy being a leading authority in the English-language realm of Japanese Fish Sausage, and yet, I feel I have accomplished something very important. For my next project I had hoped to cover the plastic food replicas often seen in the front window of Japanese restaurants (and on sale in Doguyasuji), but someone has already done an excellent job of that: Delicious Vinyl: Japan’s Plastic Food Replicas
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Another dream…
I dreamt of speaking with an Indian chief over a campfire. Unfortunately, it was not an Indian fire, but a “white man’s fire,” and it drew our enemies in closer and closer with its absurd largeness. They were taking potshots at us. Hurriedly, the chief passed onto me a buffalo horn and said simply, “you will know what to do with it.” Then he started singing: Hayayayayigh See my arrows fly Hayayayayigh Over and over and over. An arrow pierced his heart, and he passed into the next world, content. I was left holding the buffalo horn. // The thing is, I know this song from my childhood, but I…
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BMW with carbon fiber hood
Why does this guy want to make his BMW look like a civic??? Why???
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Jesus Christ
Is this shit really happening?
