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Google Ads Blocker Detector
This is a great way to greet new users to your site: Gee, I wasn’t aware that Google Ads pay per pageview. Dumbshits. Also, FUCK ADS! (this rant brought to you by Anger Management, Ltd.)
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Eating the Gift of the Magi
I can’t say much about the Hongshuai Soy Sauce scheme involving production of “soy sauce” from human hair and medical waste, except that the perpetrators should be force fed their own product via beer bong. The journalists then found the amino acid syrup manufacturer (a bioengineering company) in Hubei province. When asking how the amino acid syrup (or powder) was generated, the manufacturer replied that the powder was generated from human hair. Because the human hair was gathered from salon, barbershop and hospitals around the country, it was unhygienic and mixed with condom, used hospital cottons, used menstrual cycle pad, used syringe, etc. After filtered by the workers, the hair…
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Fugu Tip
If you are eating fugu liver pate and start feeling a tingling sensation on your lips or in your mouth, down a cup of hot sake and then immediately slit your wrists to bleed off the neurotoxin. That is all.
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Lend me an ear
TK is an older guy who works in my office. He’s married, with kids who have long grown up and moved away from the island for the usual reasons; the lack of local jobs, the hellish sameness of the Japanese countryside, etc. TK is the very epitome of salariman, a lifer, so surroundings don’t really matter that much to him – living out in the country is just an added bonus because he won’t have to move when he retires, and why should he? Life is good for him out here. TK owns a house, and a small boat, and he goes fishing every weekend. There’s really not that much…
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Just drive.
I can’t figure out if this is a joke or not. “iLane[TM] consists of a powerful and small device that interacts directly with existing Bluetoothâ -enabled handheld devices and vehicle audio systems or headsets to read messages out loud and to listen to driver instructions. The presence of the driver is automatically detected by iLane[TM], which then assumes control to intelligently capture and manage inbound information as soon as it arrives on the driver’s wireless email device (e.g., BlackBerry).” Please don’t encourage multitasking behind the wheel – aren’t there more than enough idiots on the road already? (thx sen)
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Oh My Technorati
Remember that rant about “Web 2.0” I wrote a few weeks back? That post resulted in angry geek hate mail (ooo, scawy), but today I stand vindicated: Who turned the trendportal firehose on Technorati’s front page? My proposals for a new slogan up top to complement the groovalicious avatars and collegehumor color motif: Where Blogsearch Is Fun! Digg This, Bitches! Check out the Featured Bloggers, yo! Update: I may have figured out the culprit – I believe it’s the same guy who applied a default Blogger template to Slate.
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Three days – a lifetime
Visited some cousins from the states I haven’t seen in years Went out drinking with friends for the first time in months Had some damn good yakitori, too (mmm, namagimo) In the wee hours of the morning, rode three people on a motor scooter blasted out of our minds Also, shit our pants when another scooter passed us with a cop car chasing him yelling, “STOP! We saw your face! You might as well stop!” over the bullhorn (Note to aspiring donut-nemeses: This tactic doesn’t seem to work so well as you might expect; you must put forth the effort to lie convincingly to escaping criminals) Met up with the…
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Michael Jackson – Malaysian Idol
Enjoy!
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Amusing T-shirts seen this weekend
POSSIBILITY IS NOTHIG! MEETING WITH WORLD NO SHIRT NO SHOES NO JUICY
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Cantomoko
There is a sex doll desecrating my bridge. That is all. UPDATE: OK, that wasn’t all. If you are feeling brave today, click here. If you didn’t poke your eyes out after that last link, go ahead and try this one as well.
