MSDS. It stands for Material Safety Data Sheet, and those of you who don’t already know what it is aren’t missing out on much. An MSDS describes the chemical properties, hazards identification, first aid measures, accidental spill measures, storage and handling information, etcetera etcetera blahblahblahblah of a substance in uniformly boring detail (except the hand-scrawled ones from China, legal status of which is sometimes worrying, but which can be amusing from a “is there really a company called TIN DONG PLASTICS, Ltd.?” perspective). Anyway, when a new material is being evaluated for a product, the basic research starts with its MSDS to determine if it’s suitable. Some of you working in shipping departments may know what an MSDS is since it must be included when shipping certain substances.
So I was reading one of these documents today for a kind of synthetic material (let’s call it “Smaktophonium 57” for simplicity’s sake) I had to research, and came across the following:
SKIN:
In studies on albino rabbits, Smaktophonium 57 copolymers caused moderate skin irritation. Molten polymer causes thermal burns.
I’d like to believe they didn’t test that last part on the rabbits.
EYES:
In studies on albino rabbits, Smaktophonium 57 copolymers were found to be transient, moderate eye irritants.”
Well, that’s pretty fucked up. Bad karma, labdudes. I’m sure the rabbits would agree. But what I really want to know is, how the fuck do you tell if an albino rabbit’s eyes are irritated?
Yo! You in the white coat! Pass the visine already, fucker.
“Pass the visine already, fucker.”
LOL!