Category: Web

One of these would really cut down on my commuting time in the morning (nothing like a fusillade of 40mm grenades to inspire more judicious use of gas pedals…). Plus, I could ship it to Thailand in October and mount it on an elephant, ala Suryothai.
You know what’s cool about going to the movies in Thailand (other than being able to choose your own seats via touchscreen, and drink beer from glasses)? Before the movie starts, a short tribute to the king is shown, during which everybody rises and (if I remember correctly) puts their hand across their chest ala the Pledge of Allegiance. And I mean everybody, even those little asian jungle punks sitting in the front row wearing LINKIN PARK shirts and throwing popcorn around and shit. Everybody shows respect. That’s kind of cool to watch, even if you feel kind of weird participating in it the first couple of times..

A reader here sent in an SNL clip that Adam and I have been searching for on and off for a couple years now: Quiz Kings
Chris Farley speaking Japanese! (actually, the cast’s attempts at Japanese were not bad, all things considered – certainly on par with Janet Jackson’s famous one-liner, “nikujaga ni shimasho,” from around the same period.
(thx Nevin)

A bit too one-with-naturistic frou-frou trees are screaming-ish for my tastes, but then again, I wasn’t the one attacked by a 7-foot Humboldt squid while dangling from a line at 250ft in the pitch black. Check it out:
Dancing with Demons
That guy’s got some serious huevos.

Now this is some funny shit: The World According to America

What was the #1 song on the charts the day you were born?
Actually, the only reason I post this is that I feel extremely lucky to have dodged the Bee Gees… for the second time. A few years ago I went to one of the new mega-sized beer halls with outdoor stages in Bangkok, a day before the Bee Gees were to perform there – and was hence able to have a very fine time, thank you very much.

I guess it depends on if he eats all that meat or not: DEATH RUSH

Dear DARPA,
Please build me one of these. Because it would look good in my room. Plus, you could hide a secret base in Gifu prefecture because they still have real cormorants there….

This guy rocks. And I had no idea about his column… Been away too long.
Since I’m classified as chino, I can now proudly boast the new t-shirt I picked up in Chatuchak market. (photo will be posted later)

… just because I feel like it.
FREE SASHIMI FESTIVAL IN CHIBA TONIGHT!
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Thanks, Peruvifucker!
I’ve already been harassed by the popo once because of this guy. It only takes one asshole…
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Racial profiling blows up in faces of dumbass Japanese cops
“…but captain, I thought she was a gook whore!”
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Stunning Scientific Discovery: Getting nuked may pose long term health risk!
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Shades of Cryptonomicon
In other Filipino news, T had to call off his kiteboarding trip to Borakai because of unstability thing. I approve: Getting caught up in civil unrest in a country where every strapping male’s hobby is making long knives out of truck leaf springs might sucketh kinda hardish.
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Not news in the sense that it’s not anything recent, but: JAL is FUxx0r3d.
My dialogue with a JAL steward two days ago (and nothing quite screams homo like male airplane waitress does it? Well, there’s always the Ice Capades, but that’s a different story.):
Stew: “Sir, please put up your seat”
Me: “I can’t, it’s broken.”
Stew: “No it’s not.”
Me: “Well, the other stewardess said it was.”
Stew: “Well, she’s wrong”
(I try again and it doesn’t raise)
Me: “Oh well, I guess it REALLY IS BROKEN”
Stew: “No it’s not, let me try”
(He nearly breaks a nail trying to get it to raise)
Stew: “Sir, can you please stand up from your seat?”
Me: “Come on man, I got a full tray of semi-food on my lap!”
Stew: “Seats must be raised during mealtimes…”
Me: “THERE’S NO ONE BEHIND ME, WHINESTEIN!”
Stew: “I must insist”
(I stand up while balancing the food tray, trying not to disturb the sleeping baby being held by her mother in the seat next to me. Fagalicious manages to get the seat raised 0.5 contimeters higher than it was before and announces his triumph.)
Stew: “You see, it WASN’T broken”
Me: “This seat requires one to get out of it before operating correctly; that is, by definition, most definitely broken.”
Stew: “but it RAISED so it WASN’T broken”
Me: “Your logic is broken”
Stew: (snottily) “Have a nice meal sir!”
ME: “Whatever. Go fetch me a can of coke.”

The actual wedding may be over but we are still dealing with the aftermath. I need a spark! Just a little boost… This was perfect: Gypsy jazz version of Super Mario Bros 2 song