Restaraunt Review: The Grand Buffet

I haven’t reviewed food in a while, but one visit to the Grand Buffet in Seaside, California, gave my gastronomic system such problems that I must issue a word of warning.
It all started after a game of disc golf at CSUMB, when we were trying to decide on a place to have dinner. I had always passed by the Grand Buffet, but had never gotten around to trying it.
The place was pretty packed, on Labor Day, with all sorts of people, and a huge spread at the buffet. The variety, as well as the soft serve machine and chocolate fountain initially impressed me.
The food was not very good, but it wasn’t awful. They had a strange variety that included Italian (pasta, pizza, garlic bread), Mexican (menudo! at a Chinese Buffet!!!), Japanese (the sushi was squeezed so hard that the rice looked like mochi), and a ton of Panda Express-style Chinese food.
I picked out a bunch of chicken and pork dishes, with some vegetables, and visited the buffet twice. It was there that I had the foulest hot and sour soup I have ever tasted. Bile, chinese herbs, and burnt something is what it tasted like.
The food was so greasy that I didn’t have the desire to try dessert. Dessert, ironically, was probably the safest option at this place.
My stomach let its voice be heard by converting this meal and all following food and beverages for the next 28 hours being converted into diarrhea. This was irksome for many reasons. I was limited in what I could do and where I could go for a day, the toilet required constant cleaning, and I couldn’t even use baby wipes without wincing.
I don’t want anyone to go through this, so I am advising you to stay away from the Grand Buffet for your own safety. Learn from my mistakes, so that I did not eat there in vain!
Hopefully, future reviews will focus on places that serve food that don’t give you explosive diarrhea. Ah, it’s my own damned fault. Never eat at a Chinese restaurant that serves menudo!