{"id":143,"date":"2004-02-10T19:42:01","date_gmt":"2004-02-10T19:42:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/2004\/02\/behold-a-five-assed-monkey\/"},"modified":"2004-02-10T19:42:01","modified_gmt":"2004-02-10T19:42:01","slug":"behold-a-five-assed-monkey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/2004\/02\/10\/behold-a-five-assed-monkey\/","title":{"rendered":"Behold&#8230; A Five-Assed Monkey!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"experimentallivestock2.jpg\" src=\"http:\/\/www.cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/archives\/experimentallivestock2.jpg\" width=\"448\" height=\"336\" border=\"0\" \/><br \/>\nToday was the day of the brand spankin&#8217; new Ubuyama Hoikuen&#8217;s Rakusaishiki (Opening Ceremony). There were no good photo ops, but I will eventually take and post pictures of this great new pre-school which will merge Ubuyama, Nambu, and Hokubu into one big ball of energy. Kids will be put into giant hamster wheels, with a piece of candy hanging just out of reach, and power output is expected to exceed that of the Ubuyama fusha (the windmill, which is right next to the hoikuen) by a factor of 3.<br \/>\nAnyhow, after the ceremony, I went for a short drive up to Mt. Kuju and snapped a shot of this sign that I&#8217;d seen a year earlier. So what do they do here? Is it a boneless chicken farm, like that Far Side cartoon, or is a Saruman-like mad professor crossbreeding humans with cows as the lowest sign would indicate. The top sign leads me to believe that these man-cows(oh, wait- there&#8217;s a precedent, right? I believe they are called Minotaurs) are giant, and so a road of sufficient girth was constructed to maximize their rate of mobilization. A future trip to this evil facility is definetely called for, but not without a BFG or some other suitable form of protection.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today was the day of the brand spankin&#8217; new Ubuyama Hoikuen&#8217;s Rakusaishiki (Opening Ceremony). There were no good photo ops, but I will eventually take and post pictures of this great new pre-school which will merge Ubuyama, Nambu, and Hokubu into one big ball of energy. Kids will be put into giant hamster wheels, with &hellip; <a class=\"read-excerpt\" href=\"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/2004\/02\/10\/behold-a-five-assed-monkey\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&raquo;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-143","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-strange-words"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/143","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=143"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/143\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=143"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=143"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cosmicbuddha.com\/adam\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=143"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}