Wherein I am interviewed by my Inner Gay Wedding Planner

IGWP: So have you thought about your wedding reception?
Me: Yes, it distresses me deeply. I don’t have a clue about this stuff. Fag.
IGWP: Don’t be so mean! I deserve respect; I’m a professional!
Me: Shut up, biiiiotch. Just remember: If I’m paying you this much, I better not catch you playing grabass with the caterer or something.
IGWP: That’s it! I refuse to work with such ignorant scum!
Me: You can’t quit, you’re fired! Cocksmoker.

2 Replies to “Wherein I am interviewed by my Inner Gay Wedding Planner”

  1. So, I am going to have to:
    a)not step in elephant poo while following your procession thru the jungle to Nam’s house;
    b)watch out for flying poo that your monkey army will be flinging (most likely the same poo that I avoided stepping in); and
    c)try not to get molested by the all-male on-site wedding staff.
    Hmmmm…..MAYBE I shouldn’t have sent back the “Yes! We’d love to go” postcard…

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